thinking about drinking in moderation

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Permalink Reply by evergreen78 on July 7, 2009 at 5:27pm

You Are Not Alone. Haven't you heard the AA definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over & over, expecting different results. (Actually, Albert Einstein said that.) Anyhoo, the 2nd Step says, "Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." This implies, of course, that we are somehow insane. OK. The insanity of the 2nd Step is NOT all the crazy BS we did while drinking - dancing nekkid on the bar, wearing lampshade on our head, driving without a license, writing hot checks, etc., etc. No. The insanity implied in the 2nd Step is exactly what you're talking about. . . It's that little thing in our head that says, "Welll. . . Maybe I could just have ONE." See?

What Step are you on? They say that if you're having a problem with a Step, go back to the one before that. Perhaps you need to go back to the 2nd Step. . . or maybe even the 1st Step.

The BB says (p.31) "Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going to believe they are in that class. By every form of self-deception and experimentation, they will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule, therefore nonalcoholic." Further down the same page, it says "We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself. Step over to the nearest barroom and try some controlled drinking. Try to drink and stop abruptly. Try it more than once. It will not take long for you to decide, if you are honest with yourself about it. It may be worth a bad case of jitters if you get a full knowledge of your condition."

Most folks nowadays don't like to encourage people to try some more drinking, but that's what the Book says. I hope you've noticed that nowhere in the 12 Steps or in the BB does it say "Stop drinking." The BB offers us a "design for living" AFTER we have decided to stop drinking and turn our will and our lives (our thoughts and our actions) over to the care of "God as we understand Him." See?

When I was in AA the 1st time & got to the point where it was either drink or blow my head off, I drank. I don't believe to this day that there was anything anyone could have done to stop me. I wasn't "done" yet. It took every drink I ever drank for me to get where I'm at today, but I hope I don't have to have another one. Bottom line: This is a decision you must make for yourself. All I can say is, If you'll get a sponsor & take the Steps (all 12 of them!), your drinking problem will be REMOVED. (That's on p.85.)

Later! :)

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Permalink Reply by Aaron Orsak on July 7, 2009 at 7:58pm

All alcoholics have thought this very thing....over and over and over again. My (God willing) last relapse was July 4th through 6th of last year. I had been sober for about 3 months when a friend of mine invited me to have lunch with her on the 4th. When we got to the restaurant she ordered a beer for herself and it occured to me that since I had been sober for 3 months I had this thing under control and could have a beer myself. I had heard a million times in meetings that the first drink robs us of our choice in drinking but I, like every other alkie on Earth, figured I was the exception to that particular rule. Man, was I wrong!!

3 days later I was pulled out of a room of the hotel that shared the parking lot with the restaurant we were at. Had I not run out of money, God knows how long I would have been there. My friend was lucky. She's not an alcoholic and was able to have one beer and leave. I am an alcoholic and, once that allergy started up, I no longer had ANY control of how much I would drink and for how long.

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Permalink Reply by Catherine M on February 12, 2010 at 2:16am

Thanks for the good reminders here. I too keep thinking it will be different this time...I've cried over the fact that I can't drink "normally"...it's so frustrating, but I'm accepting that this is how it is with me.

I had 9 years sober, 11 years out drinking, 5 months sober, 2 months out...and now I'm back to 15 days. I think I've FINALLY learned!

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Permalink Reply by Lynn on July 7, 2009 at 10:42pm

thre is no control Brian. Once addicted the only way to tame the monster is to elimate it.
I thought I had that power. I even had a therepist tell me have two, "behavior modification: BS... two leads to three... and before you know it I was down drinks...passing out.
I'm an intelligent health care worker. I have a passion for people and life. I also have a passion for merlot. I can't control the wine. I have to let it go, because I want to live.

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Permalink Reply by evergreen78 on July 8, 2009 at 12:37am

I LOVE THAT!!! "Geez, maybe I over-reacted." I had that EXACT thought MYSELF!!!

One of the first mtgs I went to back in '02, this guy shared that when he drank, he woke up like this: Open one eye. Open the other eye. "MY house! YES! It's ALWAYS a good day when I wake up at MY house!" And I knew I was in the right place.

I LOVE THIS FELLOWSHIP!!! Woo-Hoo!!! I Am Not Alone!!! I CAN'T STAND IT!!! :)

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Permalink Reply by Linda on July 9, 2009 at 7:55am

That is great! I will print that and keep that in my wallet and bring it out when my stinking thinking tells me that I can control my drinking.

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Permalink Reply by Kevin on August 23, 2009 at 2:42am

sometime i think that sometimes your brain is not your friend. that is why faith, friends and family ca n be the suport network to keep on track. Give up on the control thing. Concentrate on what you really have control over like your happiness, which is your full time job in life. Alcohol never gets you there

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Permalink Reply by Carolyn C on August 25, 2009 at 3:33pm

Been there too. Don't think.....get a sponsor and start working the steps. You will always think like an alcoholic until you change your thinking. Are you ready to go to any lenghts to stop drinking and treat your disease? (YES) Then get into action. (NO) then go out and try some more drinking and increasing your YET list. Big Book pg 15, "If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die." Stay for the miracle,
Your sister in soberity

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Permalink Reply by Catherine M on February 12, 2010 at 2:30am

You'll always think like an alcoholic until you change your thinking...

That makes a lot of sense...I've been an alcoholic way longer than I've ever been sober in my life. Thanks for making that point

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Permalink Reply by Carolyn C on August 31, 2009 at 11:53am

I keep out of my head by thinking of how I can help others and then try to do something nice for some else today. Action.....If you're out of your mind, your with GOD, If you're in your mind, you're with self. Hope everyone has a blessed day.
your sister in soberity

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Permalink Reply by Dave E on December 17, 2009 at 9:51pm

I first came to A.A. in 1986, I was wide open in the program, I went to meetings every night, was the secratary of the Group and was even asked to be a Guest Speaker a couple of times.I was sober 3 1/2 years, everything came so easy to me, got the family back, a good job bought a house 2 cars a boat and everything was great. I decided I didn't need to go to meetings as much anymore, then I thought I didn't need to go at all. Things came so easy I started to think that maybe I wasn't an Alcoholic after all. So I set out to prove this. At first I controled it or so I thought. By the time I realized I was not in control ,like I thought I was , it was too late. I had already started to loose everything all over again. Those people at A.A. were right, when you reach the point where I was, you can no longer drink like normal people, (who ever they are) LIke it says in "How it works" remember we deal with alcohol, cunning baffeling and powerful -Withoout help it is too much for us. I have to remember I am thinking with a brain that is infected , but there is one who has all power that one is God.

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Permalink Reply by sheila Goodfriend on December 26, 2009 at 3:20pm

Yep, that's me, too. I know my triggers but it sometimes doesn't matter,

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